At my wits end

I'm about to go on a serious whine fest. Unlike the rest of my posts here this is really more for me than anyone else.

I am at my wits end. I'm so tired of being hurt every single solitary day of my life. The threats, violence, lies, stealing, and betrayal are more than I can handle. I am tired of having panic attacks every single day of my life because I'm always worrying about what lie is going to be told to me. I can't take it anymore. I need help and there's no way to get it.  I've lost everything and no one is there for me when I need them more than ever. I don't even know who I am anymore and I'm tired of having these feelings. Tired of feeling like I want to run my car off a bridge. Tired of only having my 6 year old daughter there to comfort me when I'm sad. She's such an angel. The only good thing that has ever happened to me in my life. Anything else good is an illusion and is only temporary. It will always be only me, her, and my cats.
This pain is not temporary. It will never end. I've never been treated so horribly in my entire life and i don't even know who I am anymore. Everything is falling apart including myself and I don't know what to do.
Sometimes I wish I had more friends so I could talk to them. But then I remember that I wouldn't be able to ever see them anyway so what's the point. So I distance myself from them, from life, from love, from pain.
I wish I was dead.